{"id":61,"date":"2012-07-11T02:50:18","date_gmt":"2012-07-11T02:50:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jacobking.com\/?p=61"},"modified":"2014-01-16T00:23:19","modified_gmt":"2014-01-16T05:23:19","slug":"29-stupid-seo-things","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/29-stupid-seo-things","title":{"rendered":"29 Stupid SEO Things That Will Make You Want to Punch Someone In Their Face"},"content":{"rendered":"

If you’ve been in the industry for long enough then you have surely had many experiences where someone said something about SEO that was complete and utter bullshit. And not just any bullshit, the type of bullshit that gives some people the urge to punch someone in their face.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Here is my collection of 29 things that people have said to me personally over the years or I have read somewhere that have made me want to punch them in their face<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Note:<\/strong> These aren’t in any priority order of stupidity, I’ve just added to this list periodically until it reached 29. <\/em><\/p>\n

1. When someone scrapes your whois information and calls you to pitch an SEO service. You’re like “I do SEO son, don’t make me punch you in the face for calling this number”<\/p>\n

2. When someone asks the question “What is SEO”<\/p>\n

3. When someone asks the question “To be #1 on Google don’t you just buy a bunch of domains and forward them to your website?”<\/p>\n

4. When someone asks what your SEO secrets are.<\/p>\n

5. When someone asks you to do SEO consulting for under $xxx per hour.<\/p>\n

6. When you attend and SEO conference and strike up a conversation with some random person.<\/p>\n

7. When you see someone building link wheels.<\/p>\n

8. When someone’s website doesn’t have title tags and they are wondering why it doesn’t get any Google traffic<\/p>\n

9. When someone asks you if they should use an SEO service from Fiverr<\/a><\/p>\n

10. When someone is gaming the SERPs better than you<\/p>\n

11. When someone tries to get you to do SEO for their site as a “favor” <\/p>\n

12. When someone completely underestimates your SEO abilities until they see you making long island iced teas with a bottle of 40 year old scotch <\/p>\n

13. When someone asks the question “Isn’t SEO when you like pay Google to come up number 1 for something?”<\/p>\n

14. When one of your writers keyword sutffs like they are writing for a drunk and retarded Google spider<\/p>\n

15. When a person asks what your secret link building tactics are after Penguin<\/p>\n

16. When someone blogs about Link building being dead<\/p>\n

17. When someone writes a blog post about the value of guest blog post links<\/p>\n

18. When someone tells you that Link building is dead (yes I listed that twice because It pisses me off that much)<\/p>\n

19. When a webmaster forgets to remove the noindex tags and goes live with your site<\/p>\n

20. When you outrank an aged website with a web 2.0 property and some spam links (wait, thats when somebody else wants to punch me in the face)<\/p>\n

21. When someone has more than 7 of the same out bound links on a page (excluding coupon sites)<\/p>\n

22. When someone can’t grasp the R.O.I. they will get when paying for quality SEO work<\/p>\n

23. When someone link request spams you <\/p>\n

24. When someone wants to become your best friend just so you will do SEO for them<\/p>\n

25. When someone thinks you can 301 a penalized domain to a brand new domain and get right back on the gravy train<\/p>\n

26. When you go to college you will hear more stupid things about the SEO than you can count<\/p>\n

27. When someone thinks Google’s search algos can’t be gamed<\/p>\n

28. When you start up a discussion about link building on the SEOmoz Blog<\/a> it shouldn’t take long for someone to say something worthy of a punch to the face<\/p>\n

29. When someone tells you that “content is king”.<\/p>\n

Have a stupid SEO experience to share? Comment below. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you’ve been in the industry for long enough then you have surely had many experiences where someone said something about SEO that was complete and utter bullshit. And not just any bullshit, the type of bullshit that gives some people the urge to punch someone in their face. Here is my collection of 29… Read More →<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=61"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=61"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=61"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jacobking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=61"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}